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  • Writer's picturer2mahesh

i was just so aware that the dude sitting next to me on the plane was way cooler than me

he asked the beverage cart for decaf tea. that's so fucking smart. this is a plane from boston to los angeles, that's literally the whole entire country. if i was jittery on this flight i would be panicking over the entire freaking country. like i was on a republican campaign for anxiety, over the entire freaking country. or i was in the national tour for Sweating. Again, over the entire freaking country. but he ordered decaf tea, which is cool as hell. they didn't have decaf tea though, just regular tea, also "other decaf drinks like sprite." did you know sprite was decaf? the lady said so when she said he couldn't have decaf tea. i did not know sprite was decaf and i struggle to believe it. if it is, if she isn't lying, why did drake do all that in the sprite commercial. just because it was carbonated? i drink carbonated stuff all the time


i should state that it's not just that he ordered the decaf tea. it was everything surrounding the decaf tea. he is wearing corduroy. in eighth grade avery and ben talked about corduroy being out of fashion. at the time i had no idea things could be out of fashion. now i know that things can be out of fashion, and that they come back into fashion, and that my wardrobe moves like directly opposite to that cycle no matter how hard i try to keep it otherwise. which isn't very hard, i don't have that much money


the drinks lady got him a decaf tea from her bag, she carries decaf tea on planes too i guess. i guess there are just tons of people who had this life hack. to carry decaf tea. i guess these are probably people who are very used to having life experiences. i bet they've bonded with plenty of people over these experiences. ive always wanted to be one of those guys who bonds with a stranger over decaf tea. im not that guy though. im 22. 22 year olds drink caffeine even though it makes their hearts pump too hard. what else could i do? i don't know enough about anything to know id want decaf tea. someday though.

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